Lately I have been feeling...

Blue. There I have said it. Nothing is really wrong, just that nagging feeling that something is not right. Is it the old me rearing its ugly head - the me that had disappeared for a while. The me that wants the attention of the loved one. The me that is suspicious of him and what he is up to. This perilious long-distance relationship is making me feel that way I suppose. But do I want a life of constantly checking his whatsapp online status, wondering who he is chatting with, what he is talking about. Or do I want a life where I can be happy to have him there, to know that, no matter how far, no matter that he does not text me, that he still loves me. I chose someone who is the complete of me, so I know I have no right demand him to be like me. Or anything close. God, calm my heart. I pray to you.

Another New Year

2014 is here. A new beginning? I am not even sure what I achieved in 2013, but as all the self-help books said, you must reflect and take stock, so that you can do better in the next year's journey. Truth to be told, I did not even have the time to sit down and reflect. All I could think of was just completing things, and in between I am just too tired to think. But I guess I should at least think of what I want to achieve this year: 1. To be closer to God - I need to spend more time to know Him 2. To be healthier - the usuals - exercise more, cut down on unhealthy habits, eat healthier 3. To be more supportive to my family, emotionally and financially - parents first, then my siblings, after that my nephews and nieces, and also my closest relatives 4. To build my resume, and hopefully to get a job that will pay me better and give me some perks that I have been missing - travel, better benefits There you go. I think I know what I want, but I just have not verbalised them. And of course, I hope that my relationship with Dzan gets better. And I need to set my expectations right for this I guess. Happy new year.